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gaming rants & reviews thought of the day

XBox360, Nintendo, Playstation keynote impressions from E3 2008, pt. 2

thought of the day: sometimes, when i swat a mosquito, for a moment i feel like a vampire slayer.

So last week marked the beginning and end of the E3 2008 expo in Los Angeles, California. Traditionally, each of the main gaming platforms holds a pre-show spectacle to kick things off, and this story’s title suggests the chronology of how the three shuffled out this time around. But how did things go down? Nearly like a page from Goldilocks and the Three Bears: one was too hot, one was too cold, and one was just right. Here’s part two of three…

Nintendo


just in case you don’t believe me.
at least this version is only seven minutes.

I’ve kept it no secret among friends and other gaming journalists that my opinion of this year’s conference comes somewhere between a papercut and genital mutilation on my scale of things I’d rather not endure; it was bloody painful — not just to watch, but also to listen.

From mommy dearest’s fake, over-enthusiastic stage presence to the contrived duel of the executive fates, to Ravi yes-my-last-name-is-“Drums” awesomest gig ever warming up for the Shiggy All-Star Band and their audio-in-audio (picture-in-picture) deaf-mute sound of Wii Music… I couldn’t tell if (EVP of Sales and Marketing) Ms. Dunaway was trying to teach me my ABC’s, or if my vast collection of Koji Kondo, Yasunori Mitsuda and Motoi Sakuraba had spoiled my taste in good game music.

Sadly, while the overall content of their show didn’t turn me off completely, it was the presentation that was just a little too Humpty Dumpty having a great fall for my preference. It was a sloppy, disorganised mess with very little structure…the little info they DID have was scattered and discombobulated. Compared to the slick shows put on by the other two giants, Nintendo’s was left looking like the slacker in class who turns in their homework as a pile of crumpled papers.

I can’t say I was surprised by any of the announcements… or lack thereof as it was. While E3 may tend to be the show–at least traditionally–for the real gamers out there, Nintendo’s conference was clearly a photo op of sorts… a flim-flammery of soundbites intended for The Today Show, Ellen, Oprah, and other similar demographic shows. Perhaps they’d have done well to focus more on real announcements and information, instead of spending nearly 2/3 of the show spouting the same tired braggadocio anyone who’s seen the empty store shelves could already tell you.

A few of the puzzling details:

  • a 2-minute video for the major Animal Crossing title on Wii, and then it’s all but ignored?
  • an awkward 5 minute tease of Wii Sports 2? And what exactly about this title requires development until 2009?? It appears that between the original title, Wii Play, and Wii Fit, all the assets exist.
  • 5-10 minutes talking about a Guitar Hero DS sequel when the original is barely two weeks old?
  • hearsay about experimental DS technologies in airports and kitchens, but zero proof of any of these wonders?
  • not even a mention of the new kick-ass Wario platformer coming to Wii soon?
  • the ungodly mess that is Wii Music–or as i have dubbed it, Wii Cacophony? I had to put that rubbish on mute and look away. I love Shiggy to death, but that “game” is missing something…a whole lot of something that curiously should have been added after over TWO YEARS of development. Rhythm is a vital component of music, and to ignore that in lieu of freeform pretending is clearly not good. I may as well turn on MTV, iTunes, and my clock radio to all different channels. Same difference.

They showed software for everyone, but didn’t show stuff for everyone, if that makes sense. Nintendo has built itself up as a company of innovation and leadership in the industry, and that’s just not what anyone saw this year—casual, hardcore, or otherwise.

If Nintendo is a TV channel, it seems they’ve been airing reruns from the Home Shopping Network lately. Infomercials are fine to fill out the schedule, but we need regular programming too. Which leads me to wonder… if it’s Nintendo’s aim is to bring everyone into the “gamers” fold, what are they going to do with them once they’re there?

They might just wind up with a growing base of “core” gamers as people expand their tastes beyond the Game & Watch or Tetris varieties, and then have an army of unsatisfied customers on their hands.

One thing they need to understand is that as people are diverse, there’s no one thing that can appeal to everyone, and as a business, diversity is always key. If GM were to have turned 100% of their focus to SUVs a few years back because everyone can fit inside one and they sold like hotcakes, GM probably wouldn’t exist in today’s market at all. If Nintendo wants to include everyone as a customer, they can’t be excluding anyone.

Sure, they’ve had a good track record so far by releasing their flagship franchises in champion time, but unless the Wii has been officially declared dead, they still have work to do, and games to release. There’s plenty of time to improve what they did show or to announce new surprises to catch us off guard. And if Nintendo fans like me are good at anything, it’s holding out hope.